Sometimes I wish that everything would just stop. Just for a minute, long enough to catch my breath, to catch up. It seems like there is always something to do, and I just don’t have time to get it all done myself. Between our schedule, the hours of therapies every day, parenting in general…sometimes I just look around completely overwhelmed by all of the basic things.
Take laundry, for example. I have enough time to wash it and put it in the dryer, but by the time all of that is finished, it’s time to leave for therapy with the boys. So it sits there, ready to be folded, but I never get the time to complete it. Then the next load needs to get washed, and the first one still sits there, unfolded. But then that gets overwhelming and I want to do it even less.
There are so many things just like this. I look around and all I can se are things that need to get done, but it just doesn’t happen. I wish that I could feel restful. Wouldn’t it be great to look around and not feel guilt for all the things you haven’t had a chance to do?
I think a lot of us feel this way. It is so hard to accept the fact that we are, in fact, fallible. I know I am, anyway. I’m sure I could manage my time better, I could put less pressure on myself, I could even just be okay with not having everything done.
What if we took the pressure off?
We all put so much pressure on ourselves. What would happen it we didn’t? What would be the worst thing that would happen if one day we just….didn’t? We take that break, we allow ourselves to put the blinders on and not see the laundry. To not see the toys all over the place, to not worry about all of the cooking, all of the things that are just endless.
That’s what I need a break from. The repetition of tasks than have no end. There will always be laundry. There will always be a mess. There’s always going to be cooking that needs to be done. I’ll never be caught up, because it will always need to be done. But I think there is a lot of benefit in allowing yourself, just once in a while, a day to not see it. A day to not worry about it. Maybe that’s just…literally the definition of self care, I don’t know. But I bet that would feel good.
Maybe today I’ll try that. I just don’t know how to allow myself a mental break from all of the mundane without all of the guilt. Maybe I’ll just start with a few hours and see how that feels.