cptsd

When religion/faith and trauma don’t quite mix

Maybe I should warn you now, this post might be one you disagree with, or not understand, and that’s okay. I’m aware I’m probably in the minority with my feelings, but that’s okay too. I don’t talk about religion or God much or anything like that. Usually, I avoid the topic at all costs. The …

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When your fears remind you of your childrens strength

Right now, I am sitting in the heart hospital for an echo and a few other tests. As I was walking in, I felt nervous and uneasy. And kind of afraid. My 2 children and I have a severe genetic disorder, and one of the things it causes is cardiomyopathy. We are all at very …

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Dear universe…

Dear universe, please help me. I feel so scared and alone right now. Everything hurts and I feel like there’s no way out but…out. I’m losing ground in a battle that isn’t mine to win. I feel like I’m drowning, and instead of sending lifeboats, people are throwing rocks. Universe, I don’t ask of much …

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Fighting

I do a lot of fighting. Fighting for my kids. For their medical needs to be met and exceeded. Fighting for my family, my husband…fighting for all the people in my life who can’t always fight for themselves in the moment. I’ve been a fighter my entire life. Every day of my existence is a …

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Panic

Anxiety when it makes no sense. But really, if you look at it…it makes perfect sense. Anxiety when you feel useless. Anxiety when you don’t feel good enough. When you feel like no one cares. When all you feel is alone. Anxiety. Panic. Isolation.Fear. Whatever it feels like…whatever you call it…does it really matter? It’s …

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