ptsd

27

Year 27. A year I’d never thought I’d make it to. To be honest, I’m surprised every year when I turn a year older. It just always feels like an accomplishment, like I survived once again despite the odds being stacked against me. Year 26 was brutal. Most of it life circumstances, some of it …

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Never good enough

No matter how much I want to, I’ll never be able to speak the words that my head is screaming. I’ll always be a disappointment. Burdened to carry the weight of the world myself. I need to get this away from me. I need to share the weight of it. This is crushing me, and …

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The softened mood

A fight. A disagreement. An argument. Tension. It doesn’t matter why. I’m not getting what I need, neither is he. He doesn’t know my half of it though, he doesn’t know what happened. I’d never be strong enough to tell him. I can feel where this is going. This is an all too familiar feeling. …

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Built up tension

It’s been over a week since I’ve been to therapy, a vast difference from my typical twice a week schedule. I like it when things make sense, when I can be prepared, and when I more or less know what’s coming. I thought that would be the case going into Monday. Honestly, I thought I’d …

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