safety

War of voices

Tonight is an absolute shit show, where I’m sure I’ve made mistakes. All I want to do is give up. All I want to do is listen to the demons and the voices in my head telling my my life isn’t worth it. That all I cause is pain and burden and problems. That voice …

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Dear sleep…

Hey there, sleep. It’s been a while since we’ve been in sync, hasn’t it? I’ve not seen much of you lately. We maybe spent 3 hours together last night. And not much more any other thought this past week. But, sleep, you’re supposed to help heal me. You’re supposed to help me recover from the …

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Even on vacation I can’t escape the flashbacks

I’ve been doing a pretty good job keeping the struggles of my reality out of my Disney vacation. I’ve managed to keep the real world distant from the (relative) safety and peace of Disney World. It’s something I’ve needed…a few days to just completely detach from my life. Up until last night, I’d been able …

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The time has come for more honest conversations

Tomorrow evening, I will once again have to face the person who sexually assaulted me a few weeks ago. Due to the nature of who this person is, it is impossible to simply remove myself from their life, from their presence. It is an ongoing situation that I am still desperately trying to find safety …

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Life is hard.

That’s it. That’s all I have to say for now. Life is freaking hard. And it’s painful. And it’s often times confusing as hell to navigate. I often have no idea what I’m doing. Because this crap is hard. I often question whether or not it’s supposed to be this difficult, but that really doesn’t …

Life is hard. Read More »