Well, for the first time in nearly a year, and since the beginning of my pregnancy 10 months ago…it happened. I’m almost out of alcohol. I stopped drinking as soon as I got pregnant, which means that all of the alcohol I had already went unused and untouched, waiting for me to return to it, …
Of the many things that comes with having a new baby, isolation is one of them. It definitely can be lonely and isolating at times. The baby is 4 weeks old now, and the loneliness factor has definitely set in. My husband was supposed to go back to work this week, but we decided to …
Off the wagon: to be drinking alcohol again after a period of abstinence. If an alcoholic could ever drink “responsibly” (which they can’t), I’m sure it would look a lot like this. A lot like what I’m doing now. Drinking in “reasonable” amounts, only at night, and not harming anyone. Well, at least no one …
I’m probably about as burnt out as one can be. I’m currently running on 4 hours of sleep, and the night before that wasn’t much better. Last night was super rough because now the baby is dealing with reflux, which both of my other kids did, so we were expecting it. But damn, it really …
Do you ever feel just so completely desperate? Desperate to feel better, to feel differently…to feel anything? That’s how I feel right now. Just…so, so desperate. My feelings are not cooperating with me. I’m existing in a space that feels quite difficult to occupy. My mind and my body don’t want to exist, while my …
Sometimes, I feel like the world is out to get me sometimes. But I also know that I’m like…this fucking small, and the universe doesn’t actually give a shit about me. Still, some days are hard. Today was hard as shit. I didn’t feel good physically, nothing went well at all, and I completely collapsed …
Therapy Tuesdays have officially turned into therapy Mondays. I don’t love the change schedule wise…it makes my Monday nights much more rushed do to the kids therapy schedule, but other than that, it went well. Just because of how the schedule works out, I won’t have therapy next week. And that honestly stresses me out …
The good husband. The loyal husband. The “give me what I want” husband. The good husband takes many forms. Last night, it comes in the form of a bit of selfishness. Give her what she wants if she gives me what I want. That’s the game we’re playing. But the good wife knows the rules. …
It’s been…a hell of a weekend. Life is starting to catch up with me, and to be honest, all I want to do is drink. Like…all I want to do. I’ve managed to abstain from slipping back into some bad patterns, but it’s been hard. All day today, all I wanted to do was drink. …
Hey, I’m just checking in. I’m one of those annoying people that notices and cares when I think something might be up, so I just wanted to let you know that I’m here if you need me at all or need to talk. Hope you’re doing okay. ❤️ That was the exact message that I …