I had a post ready to go for this morning, but then my friend Danielle over at TheDailyAddict wrote a post with me in mind.
It’s called For Alana, and it made me feel a little less alone. So I’m going to share her words here this morning instead.
I’m grateful for her, her blog, and all the other friends I’ve made here in the WordPress community. You do all mean a lot to me.
I read a post yesterday that described the trap, the hamster wheel, the mess of active addiction profoundly.
For this person the drug of choice is alcohol. The drinking brings her relief, it makes her feel better and worse all at the same time.
I know this state of being.
I felt that the drug/alcohol was the only thing that was holding me together. It was the only way that I could cope in this world.
And this had to be ok for awhile. Until it wasn’t.
I have learned since then that “Addiction is a response to human suffering.” -Dr. Gabor Mate
I was not drinking to hurt anybody…I was drinking to protect myself. I used it to survive.
If you were a witness to my life on the “outside” you would say I was spoiled and had everything. That I was destroying my life.
But it was not the outside that mattered. The inside of me was already destroyed and I was acting accordingly.
To my friend Alana; it is not a crime to survive. There are wounds that cause us to behave in certain ways. It’s all ok.
God’s got you.
You can find her original post here