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Hard time with the holidays

Thanksgiving is historically not my favorite day. I had a hard time with the holidays growing up because my home life was always very chaotic and tumultuous.

Thanksgiving in particular I have a certain disdain for. I have a traumatic history with Thanksgiving, and I’ve always had a hard time accepting it and moving past it.

Fast forward to now, and I still struggle with it. Holidays in general are hard. I don’t enjoy a bunch of people coming over, I don’t love being forced to socialize, and I hate having to force a smile and pretend to be okay and happy when I am just so…not.

I don’t have a lot of words for today other than I’m struggling. The holidays are hard for a lot of us, but for those who struggle with depression or anything similar, for those with difficult families…the holidays bring extra challenges.

If you celebrate this day, I hope you find something worth celebrating. I hope you find a moment, even just one, that brings a little bit of peace or happiness.

For me, that moment will come tonight.

When everyone is asleep, the company is gone, and I have a hot cup of coffee and a piece of pie.

That will be my moment. And even though today is hard, I’ll get through it knowing that I have a small moment of happiness coming my way.

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