How I’ve been feeling these last few days…these last few weeks even…. It’s not okay. I feel like shit. Physically, I’m in the worst flare up I’ve been in in a long time. I can’t sleep both because of the extra levels of pain, and the additional nightmares. Despite my husband working what seems like […]
Running out of fight Read More »
Okay. Let’s take a second to keep it real. Things have been rough lately. Really, really rough. My birth sons birthday, then Mother’s Day (one hell of a trigger, regardless of the fact that I parent 3 other children), a lot of challenging medical things with my kids (and myself), and a lot of loss.
The old me is making a strong push to become the new me, once again. I don’t know how I feel about it. Well, that’s not true. I do know how I feel about it. But I feel very differently about it, depending on what time of day I were to ask myself. I recognize
This is a post for accountability. Things have been hard. Obviously. But I’ve been sober. Mostly. I’ve done a job worthy of being insanely proud of. After 15 years of more or less active (alcohol) addiction, I dug myself out, alone, and got myself sober. It was grueling and excruciating. It hurt. Physically, emotionally, and
I don’t want to go backwards Read More »
It’s been another week full of business and chaos and complicated feelings. So…basically a completely normal week for me. 🤦🏻♀️ Tomorrow is Mother’s Day, which, if you know me, you’ll know I have some pretty complicated feelings about. In the adoption community the day before Mother’s Day is known as Birth Mother’s Day. And that
Complicated feelings Read More »
Do you know what happens when you open up a pressure cooker without first releasing the pressure? Well, if you don’t, here’s what happens. “The contents will erupt violently, potentially causing serious burns, injuries, and property damage.” Thaaaaaaaats how I felt last night. And honestly, how I am still feeling now. Like I was opened
Emotions like a pressure cooker Read More »
I don’t know what I’m looking for, but I feel like I’m constantly searching for something. Something to fulfill me. To feel less empty, to feel like I have a place in this world. Or a purpose. I really don’t know. I just feel so… empty. Or lacking. Like there’s a part of me that
Searching for something Read More »
While a good, solid music appreciation post is nothing new to this blog, what you might find different about this post is the genre. A far cry from our typical rap/hip hop…we’re going country today. When I first moved to Texas 11 years ago, there were only 2 radio stations I found that came in
The last few weeks have been…umm…how do we put this…really fucking brutal. The burnout is real, the exhaustion is insane, and I am just so…I don’t know. Tired. I know I haven’t talked about it a ton, but I’m actually doing mostly really well with the sobriety/not drinking thing. After the first 2 weeks of
When the depression kicks your ass Read More »
While I have spent the past 6 days emotionally recovering from the bullshit that life can sometimes be…I was handed yet another curveball. As you may or may not know (but you probably do, let’s be honest), me and my 3 kids suffer from an insanely rare, and in fact non existent outside of our
Bleeding from…where??! Read More »
