If I had to pick a one liner for how therapy went last night, it’s that we will not have another breakdown this year regarding my birth son. So, I guess that’s just the plan. Stay strong, don’t break down, and keep on moving. Or…some shit like that. Not, like…exactly sure how that works? But …
Today is the last day of spring break here. And let me tell you, it has been a long week. My 6 year old will go back to school tomorrow, leaving me home with just my 4 year old and 5 month old. (Yes, he’s 5 months as of yesterday 😭). I will be glad …
Suddenly, the world feels a million pounds heavier. Everything is building up, nothing can get done. Things are getting harder and harder and harder. Thoughts are becoming darker and darker and darker. Things are going on that I don’t know how to get into. Like, despite the fact that I asked, I reached out, I …
I feel so lost. So broken, so alone. I want to reach out, but I don’t know how, or to who, or what to say. Grief is the most underestimated feeling on the planet. It fucking shows up and destroys you, no matter what you do to mute it’s effect. I ignored it. I pretended …
I have been struggling a lot these past few days. Laundry? That’s a hard nope. Drinking more alcohol, having darker thoughts, thinking about dying and self harm, even when I’m sober… Everything is hard. I don’t want to do anything. Like, at all. Letting the kids watch tv so they are quiet and not screaming …
Therapy last night, which is now back to its regular scheduled time of Monday nights, went well. We spent most of the 2 hours going over different DBT stuff and filling out a goals worksheet for the week. Different things to practice in terms of mindfulness and stuff. It’s a lot to take in and …
Life has been an absolute whirlwind these past few weeks. My son starting school, my marriage being momentarily tumultuous, therapy being big and important and something I’m thinking about…just, like, having 3 kids in general… Yeah. I have more than enough on my plate to keep me busy and my mind occupied. However, something happened …
I had therapy this morning, and even though I had a really rough week, it definitely went well. It’s a good thing my husband and I got in a fight that completely dysregulated me and freaked me out over the weekend. (Kidding, but also sort of not.) Anyway, it started off the same way it …
I tried to go slower tonight. Start later, make it weaker…drink it more slowly. And I succeeded. Until about…an hour into the night. And now, here we are. And I’ve had more than I should have. Still having more than I should. I know I should stop. I want to stop. I know I’ll regret …
Monday is my typical therapy night. And while last night, I didn’t have my therapy (this week I have it on Thursday)…I still did have therapy yesterday. But it wasn’t for me. I met with a new therapist who I painstakingly picked out with the help of my therapist. I was nervous, and even though …