Month: May 2022

Turns out, I’m not responsible for your feelings.

Another shocking revelation, courtesy of therapy, is that I’m not responsible for your feelings. And, no, you aren’t responsible for mine either. This is a concept that honestly, I don’t fucking understand. Hear me out. If you kill my dog, I will be very sad and very hurt. You did this. You killed my dog. …

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Hope on the horizon…maybe.

Well, we wasted no time getting into it in therapy last night, but I’d argue to say that it didn’t go poorly. She said some things that I was ready and able to hear, and whenever that happens and we’re able to have difficult yet honest conversations, it always feels better. I think we’re finally …

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Irony

I didn’t get better fast enough, and now I’m feeling alarmingly worse. I wasn’t vulnerable enough, couldn’t feel secure fast enough. And now I don’t know if it will ever be possible to feel those things. Some things got better, but it wasn’t better enough. I was struggling, barely holding on. And it feels like …

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It just hurts too much.

I’m tired. I’m too tired to keep doing this. I don’t have anything better than that to say today. Depression is kicking my ass, the pain is winning, and I feel broken and alone. I keep wondering what the point is, and I just don’t think there is one anymore. I’m not okay. I haven’t …

It just hurts too much. Read More »