Effective communication drastically reduces the occurrence of being surprised and confused by another persons actions. That’s the situation I found myself in last night. My husband and I drove to therapy together, as we have been since being down to only one car. Both of our therapists are in the same office complex, so he’ll […]
Nothing and everything Read More »
“I’m going to say something shitty to you now, and I apologize for that” *Takes half a second….realizes that it’s not worth it…I don’t need to say something that would hurt him.* Oh boy. Do you ever have those moments…where you know EXACTLY just what to say, just what feels so fucking correct and accurate……but
Rolling with the punches…kind of Read More »
Sometimes, you just need to take a minute to feel all of your feelings. And that was me last night. Somewhere abound 11:30 last night, I just broke. I felt as alone as I actually am. And I allowed myself to feel it. Instead of texting my best friend, being upset with her because all
Alone in the worst ways Read More »
If there’s one thing that’s absolutely true in life, it’s that grief is not one size fits all. How one person feels, or outwardly handles grief may be completely different than you, or not what you’d expect…and that’s fine. It’s one of the those things that’s just so individualized and so personal, and you can’t
Grief looks different on everyone Read More »
My head isn’t a fun place to be in this morning. It’s dark, it’s scary, it’s fragile… Last night my husband and I had therapy together with both of of therapists. So, it was all 4 of us together. We’ve been talking about doing this for a while, and I’m glad it happened. It was
Getting my head right Read More »
The anxiety is hitting hard tonight. And I don’t know where to put it. Last night was hard. It didn’t end how I wanted it to. The anxiety over my husband going back to work was too much. The stress of accepting (or not accepting) my new “normal” was too much. I drank way too
Nowhere to go to escape the pain and hide from life Read More »
8 years ago, I said yes to my best friend. And he said yes to me. One week ago today, the thought of seeing our 8th anniversary together was threatened, when a deer ran through his drivers side window and severely injured him. This year has been hell for us. We’ve had a lot thrown
Thriving and surviving. 8 years later. Read More »
I’ve been in a pretty big funk since my husband got into his accident on Tuesday. He went through a trauma…but so did I. There are things I can’t unsee, can’t unhear, and can’t unfeel. I can’t talk about any of it with him, and everyone else has been pretty unavailable when it comes to
Unprocessed trauma, and all of these foreign feelings. Read More »
Hurt is….it’s an interesting concept. And it means a lot of different things. Physically, emotionally, different levels and layers of it….. I guess it could best be described as an onion. Layers and levels and varying degrees of pain. The past few days…I have been HURT. With a capital H, and all the others capital
Hurt. But how do you proceed? Read More »
Sometimes, nights have no business being as good as they are. Like tonight, for instance. Last night, my husband got the news that his dad, who has been on hospice battling many forms of cancer, had less than 2 months to live. His throat cancer had returned (on top of the liver and colon cancer),
Hard, but not broken. And worth it anyway. Read More »