January 2022

Another attempt at EMDR

When I went to therapy on Friday it was definitely….productive. Even though it was only an hour (as opposed to 2 hours which they often are), we got a little bit done. A few months ago, we tried doing EMDR to get through some of my trauma and to help with drinking less and all …

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When the pain just doesn’t end

I’d rather die than keep missing him like this. I’m sorry, I know that’s a harsh start to a post…but it’s true. I’d rather die than live without him. He’s literally my child, and I’m navigating this world without him. And that just…..it doesn’t make any sense. It’s only getting harder. He’ll be 8 this …

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Panic

Anxiety when it makes no sense. But really, if you look at it…it makes perfect sense. Anxiety when you feel useless. Anxiety when you don’t feel good enough. When you feel like no one cares. When all you feel is alone. Anxiety. Panic. Isolation.Fear. Whatever it feels like…whatever you call it…does it really matter? It’s …

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Losing my voice

I feel like I’m losing my voice. I’m struggling with what to say, what to write, or even what to feel. I feel so broken and useless. I’m pushing people away and shutting down. It’s the worst place to be in. I hate this feeling..the feeling of losing my voice and my identity. The only …

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