I still don’t really know what I’m feeling. Or, maybe it’s not that I don’t know what I’m feeling, and more that I know exactly how I’m feeling…and I just don’t want to feel this way. Or that I think I shouldn’t. Or that I don’t want to feel this way. I’m having more trouble […]
Uncomfortable feelings Read More »
Imagine having anxiety, but doing it anyway. Imagine being afraid, but doing it anyway. Can you picture it? All of the fear, all of the worry, all of the pain and anxiety and all of the other…. And doing it anyway? Can you imagine the freedom that must feel like? Doing it anyway. I don’t
Imagine if you did it anyway Read More »
There is no one in the world you can count on. No one you can trust. You work for so hard, for so long, all in the name of learning how to trust. How to feel safe. Secure. How to feel okay. And for what? To be proved right time and time again. People leave.
24 hours from now, if everything goes as planned today and the kids get cleared from their doctor this afternoon…we will finally reveal our super amazing surprise. My day couldn’t possibly busier today, and I’m absolutely freaking out about how stressed I am. But I suppose it’s the good kind of stress? I don’t know.
Excitement or anxiety Read More »
Well, we’re finally home from the hospital. We got home late on Sunday afternoon after I confidently expressed my abilities to care for Christian at home with all of the medical equipment and medications we have at home. They agreed, since he was seemingly hydrated enough to be off IV fluids by that point. I
The wins shouldn’t feel shameful Read More »
Well, here we are. The blog post that I did not necessarily want to write, but will do my best at anyway. Last night was my first brand new therapy session in years. Make no mistake about it, my therapist did not change, I still spoke with the same person I’ve been speaking with for
Change can be painful Read More »
Well, I did it. I got through it. Was it every bit as brutal as I thought it would be? Erm, to be very honest, it was quite a bit worse. At least, the beginning of it was. Let’s back up. Last night I had my last therapy session in the office, the room, I’ve
Endings only lead to new beginnings Read More »
Despite my pleads with Sunday to please hang around an extra day….here we are. At the beginning of another Monday. This Monday in particular is one I’ve been dreading for quite some time now. Therapy has gone rather horribly the past few weeks. And while I’m sure there’s more than one contributing factor…the biggest one
Sometimes, things happen in life that feel really, really big. And they are big. But over time, it starts to feel less big. And less of a big deal. I’m sure that will happen with me in this situation as well…but I’m not there yet. Not even close. I really just didn’t have the emotional
One day, but not today. Read More »
Well, here we are again. Monday. This Monday is far from my favorite Monday simply because it’s atypical. It won’t end with therapy like all of my other Mondays do, it’s the last Monday of the summer before school starts, and it just feels so…off. I really wish that today was as it usually is,
When a room is more than a room Read More »
