Necessary(?) changes

The best part about Mondays is that I have therapy (nearly) every Monday night. It truly makes Mondays tolerable. it’s the only thing that makes it tolerable.

I had a great 6 hours over the weekend. The baby took a 3 hour nap on Saturday AND Sunday. And my husband took the kids out during nap time both days, so I got some actually, legitimate quiet time.

Today is a weird vibe already. Here in Texas, we’re getting all kinds of advisories and alerts about the heat. It’s gonna get up to like 110°f today and be…..🥵

Sooo….therapy won’t be in the park tonight. I can handle any amount of cold weather, but I don’t mess around with the heat.

Things have not been going our way in life lately. It’s frustrating, both my husband and I are feeling the strain of it, and we’re both just…done. I’m pretty sure he’s going to end up not going to work today. It’s just…it’s too much. He’s too miserable there, he needs a change, and when he’s miserable…I don’t do well.

So I kind of just told him to say fuck it, not go to work, go take his licensing test and see if he passes and go on from there. And if that fails, we’ll start a YouTube channel where we do food reviews of ridiculous things, talk about life and family and marriage and chaos and Disney and monetize off of that. You guys would watch that, right?

I really have no idea if he’s planning on going to work today. Or if he’s planning on quitting his job. Or any of it. All I know is that I’m impulse buying a lot.

Pretty much, if I need something, I’m getting it. I have 2 trips to Florida coming up soon, and I feel unprepared. I travel a lot so I should have everything I need. Except for that feeling that I don’t. Or maybe I just want new things. Like sunglasses (which I’ve literally never owned a pair of….ever) and sandals (which I don’t wear because my feet hurt in them, but maybe I would?).

Life is really heavy right now, and it doesn’t feel too good. There’s a lot of pain that I just don’t want to talk about. Or can’t. I’m not sure.

I’m really glad I have therapy tonight. Because life isn’t too fun right now. And as much as I don’t want to pull back and isolate…I can tell that’s exactly what’s happening. I’m not happy with how things are right now. No one is.

But it isn’t all bad. Atlas is officially 8 months old and he said “ba” for the first time (yes he’s very delayed) and it was adorable and so cute. And it’s the little things like this that make life worth living.

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