When you run for long enough, I guess eventually…you just get tired.
Too tired to run anymore. Too tired to fight.
Today I feel just absolutely awful. I don’t want anything, nothing feels good….it all just feels…bad.
I don’t want to run anymore. I’m not even running from anything other than the thoughts in my head…the enormous stressors I’m facing in my life.
I feel bad to the point where I don’t even know if I care if it burdens other people, I need them anyway. I just need to feel better. And I know that means allowing other people to support me.
When you feel so fucking depressed that even your own bed doesn’t feel good anymore…shit. That’s low. It’s as low as I get.
I’m not anxious. Not angry or upset or stressed…not overwhelmed….
Just numb.
Sad, numb, and empty. Head hanging low, acknowledging that I need support right now. And that I have to stop pushing away the people who care, and let them be there for me.
