abuse

Dear rapist, haven’t you taken enough from me?

I had honestly hoped, as shitty as the situation was, that things could eventually become.. better. I thought things could…possibly one day resemble some sort of normalcy. Although I knew I might never forgive you, I tried to convince myself that maybe I could try. Because regardless of the shit that you did to me …

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Fighting

I do a lot of fighting. Fighting for my kids. For their medical needs to be met and exceeded. Fighting for my family, my husband…fighting for all the people in my life who can’t always fight for themselves in the moment. I’ve been a fighter my entire life. Every day of my existence is a …

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Reconnecting with my past

I’ve always been a writer. Even going as far back as elementary school, I’ve always gravitated towards writing to communicate my feelings. I had…a rather intense childhood, and it’s not something I like to think about or relive. Since we’re going to be starting EMDR in therapy soon…I’m kind of going to be forced to …

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Done

I won’t relive the past. The present is torturous enough. The past holds too much pain. I refuse to combine the two. Accidental pressure leads to too much blood. I’m sorry. Emotional pain leads to more and more and more pain. Logic left behind, the lies of pain the only thing that remains. I upset …

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The dreaded tomorrow

Tomorrow brings another Tuesday. A 2 hour therapy day…and one that I desperately need to NOT completely fuck up again. I have something along the lines of…hope(?) that maybe I can just like…be normal? Which, of course, means going in there and being sarcastic and light and not serious at all about anything because I’m …

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