The last few weeks have been…umm…how do we put this…really fucking brutal. The burnout is real, the exhaustion is insane, and I am just so…I don’t know. Tired. I know I haven’t talked about it a ton, but I’m actually doing mostly really well with the sobriety/not drinking thing. After the first 2 weeks of […]
When the depression kicks your ass Read More »
Things have gone from bad to worse, and I’m absolutely exhausted. Yesterday was a day that must’ve come straight from the brains of hell, delivered just for me. On Monday night (but really Tuesday morning), Phoenix, my 6 year old, who has been struggling with an ongoing GI issue, decided to throw up a ton
Yes, it did get worse. Read More »
Dear anything, While I don’t know exactly what I need from you right now, I do know that it’s something. Anything. I need anything to keep going. An ounce of hope. A reason to believe things will be okay… An iota of stress being taken off my plate. Things are only getting more and more
Some days will be just like today. Where the bad just piles on. Nothing good about it. Just…crisis after crisis. Fire after fire. That’s what today has been. Questions followed by more questions, uncertainties followed by anxieties. Today was not easy. From the moment I woke up until the very end of it. Nothing went
Phewwwww. Well, we survived Christmas. Christmas Eve day was tough. And a bit triggering. But we got through it. I spent mostly all day wrapping gifts…as I hadn’t even started before then. It was nice to have something distracting to do on an otherwise extremely difficult day. The nighttime was spent building bikes for the
Glad that’s over, and I NEED that dime! Read More »
It’s really just that simple. Depression fucking sucks. It sneaks up on you, even when you think, when you’re trying so desperately hard to convince yourself…that you’re ahead. That you’re in control. I should’ve known by the level of procrastination that’s happening that I was headed face first into a pit of depression….but still. I
Depression freaking sucks. Read More »
Sometimes, I really hate being a parent. Today is one of those days. I’m angry and frustrated and more exhausted than I can put into words. We transitioned the 6 month old baby from his bassinet in my room to his crib in his room last night. I knew it would be a hard transition…but
Transitions really suck Read More »
I’m probably about as burnt out as one can be. I’m currently running on 4 hours of sleep, and the night before that wasn’t much better. Last night was super rough because now the baby is dealing with reflux, which both of my other kids did, so we were expecting it. But damn, it really
Every…however often it is…things seems to feel worse. The shift is subtle, and usually, no one would be able to tell. But there’s one area where the shift becomes incredibly blatant and apparent. I don’t smile, I don’t want to be touched, I’m not going to pretend to be happy for your benefit…I’m exhausted all
When physical touch makes you cringe Read More »
Happy Saturday, everyone! Oh, it has been a looooong week. My son is still pretty sick, and last nigh was rough for him. He was crying in his bed every few minutes “mommy, I need a tissue again, open the door!” He refuses to let me leave anything different or new in his bed. I
Giving myself a (much needed) break Read More »
