grief

You can’t break a broken heart

Sometimes, therapy just….is what it is. I knew last night would be hard. I knew I’d have to talk about the things that hurt the most. And that’s exactly what happened. As soon as I got there, she basically said “let’s color today, it seems like a good day for coloring”. I totally didn’t disagree. …

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If I leave first, you can’t hurt me

When the anxiety is so palpable, you can hear nothing but your own heartbeat inside of your ears. Your chest feels like it’ll very likely explode with the next way too strong beat. You don’t want to drink more. You know that won’t help! But it does……..until it doesn’t. Until you take it too far. …

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51 weeks

He’s 51 weeks old. That means that next week, in 7 days…he turns one. And that’s a day I have been dreading for weeks now. More than likely, he’s my last. Our last baby, our last first birthday…and I hate it all so much. I’ve put off planning a party. Buying decorations. Coming up with …

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A year ago, I lost a friend

I’ve been blogging here on WordPress for a good few years now. And in those 3ish(?) years, I’ve learned a lot of things. I’ve learned about myself, I’ve learned about other people and their stories, both similar to mine and completely different. But the thing that’s made the biggest impact is the actual, genuine, real …

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