marriage

All or nothing

She’s right, I am all or nothing. It feels good or it doesn’t. And if it doesn’t feel good now, it must never have felt good. Laying next to me like a stranger instead of holding me like a friend. It isn’t his fault. I’m sure it’s mine. It always is. Right? Tonight did not …

All or nothing Read More »

When “I love you” turns into “I need you”

There are 2 very opposing sides of me. The colder, more distant and avoidant version…and the more needy, clingy, very, very broken version of me. These 2 different versions of me could not be more opposing. They are both very broken, but I guess they are different kinds of broken. The version of myself that …

When “I love you” turns into “I need you” Read More »

Pushing people away when I need them the most

Lately, I find myself feeling very down about myself. I just don’t feel good about anything. I don’t like how I feel, I don’t like how I’m acting because of it…and I don’t know. It just leaves me feeling really pretty worthless and like I have no value..nothing to offer. I guess it feels like …

Pushing people away when I need them the most Read More »