When the world feels too big, make it smaller.

Sometimes something happens, and it leaves you feeling helpless, or scared, or however you’re feeling. For me, sometimes it feels like the world is just way too big. Like I don’t know what to do next, or there is just too much to do, or too many stressors. I don’t know how to explain it other than just… it feels like the world is too big. It can be overwhelming.

When that happens to me, whenever I feel like that, I really have to step back. I’m never going to be able to function in a state where I’m continuously overwhelmed. It’s not good for anyone to feel like that. So I literally just start temporarily eliminating things until I’m able to handle more. I make my world smaller.

For example, this morning, my younger son had a specialist appointment over 2 hours away, and it wasn’t one of the very important ones. But lately I’ve just been overwhelmed with everything, and the thought of a 6 hour day stuck in a car and hospitals with a toddler just seemed…unnecessary. So I rescheduled it. It was just more than I could take on my plate for today.

Taking a step back

Sometimes the first step is just taking a step back. Looking at and prioritizing, making things more manageable for yourself. So today what’s what I did. I stepped back and made my day just a bit easier.

Sometimes the world really just feels too big and I lose my place in it. Making a change, taking a step back, giving myself a fighting chance…it’s the first step.

I don’t know what else I need to do to build myself back up, but I know I need to make some changes. I’m going to need to start focusing on myself if I have any chance at finding my place in this world again.

I still haven’t told anyone what happened…maybe those are my next steps. Actually telling somebody.

Easier said than done though, unfortunately. But I think I’m getting there. To be honest, I’m feeling really crappy today. And I have no motivation to do anything. I know I’m on shaky ground, and I need to really take care of myself.

I just wish I knew how to.

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