Sometimes something happens, and it leaves you feeling helpless, or scared, or however you’re feeling. For me, sometimes it feels like the world is just way too big. Like I don’t know what to do next, or there is just too much to do, or too many stressors. I don’t know how to explain it other than just… it feels like the world is too big. It can be overwhelming.
When that happens to me, whenever I feel like that, I really have to step back. I’m never going to be able to function in a state where I’m continuously overwhelmed. It’s not good for anyone to feel like that. So I literally just start temporarily eliminating things until I’m able to handle more. I make my world smaller.
For example, this morning, my younger son had a specialist appointment over 2 hours away, and it wasn’t one of the very important ones. But lately I’ve just been overwhelmed with everything, and the thought of a 6 hour day stuck in a car and hospitals with a toddler just seemed…unnecessary. So I rescheduled it. It was just more than I could take on my plate for today.
Taking a step back
Sometimes the first step is just taking a step back. Looking at and prioritizing, making things more manageable for yourself. So today what’s what I did. I stepped back and made my day just a bit easier.
Sometimes the world really just feels too big and I lose my place in it. Making a change, taking a step back, giving myself a fighting chance…it’s the first step.
I don’t know what else I need to do to build myself back up, but I know I need to make some changes. I’m going to need to start focusing on myself if I have any chance at finding my place in this world again.
I still haven’t told anyone what happened…maybe those are my next steps. Actually telling somebody.
Easier said than done though, unfortunately. But I think I’m getting there. To be honest, I’m feeling really crappy today. And I have no motivation to do anything. I know I’m on shaky ground, and I need to really take care of myself.
I just wish I knew how to.