The past 6 days have honestly been the most wild whirlwind of events and roller coasters that I’ve experienced in quite some time. Okay, here’s the deal. It’s March. Which means, it’s birthday month. Technically, yes. My birth son’s birthday is in April…April 4th. But the entire lead up to it is in March, which […]
Ready to fight, almost ready to hope. Read More »
This week has been a massive variation of highs and lows, and I can honestly say I’m just so glad that it’s finally Saturday. And that I can’t wait for therapy on Tuesday. Overall, I’m feeling pretty okay this morning. I have the entire house to myself for a least a good few hours, and
I will always show up for them Read More »
It’s nights like these….where the day was a little bit too long. The triggers were a little bit too triggering. And the thoughts are a little bit too heavy. You’re doing your best…but you know you’re failing. Honesty has been a bit of a struggle for me here lately. Possibly because I’m fighting so hard,
When you want to reach out….but you don’t know how Read More »
Dear universe, and the people who live in it… Where are you? When I need you, too…where do you go? I know where I am when you need me…and it’s right there. I’m right there. If you need me, I’m here. When you need a shoulder, when you need advice…when you need support…I’m there. I’m
Sometimes…the conversations that hit the hardest are quick, short lived, and completely unexpected. It’s around 10pm. It’s a typical night here, and I’ve made a few drinks according to my specific plan and routine I have for myself. I made a drink, but left it across the room. A few minutes later, I was looking
Real conversations when you need them the most Read More »
I can think of few things that needed to happen as much as last night in therapy needed to happen. In case you’re new here, the only bit of context you might need is that my therapist and I have been working together for a loooong time. Like, 9-10 years. Every week. Sometimes twice a
Okay, therapist. I’ll let you in. Read More »
Sometimes, nights have no business being as good as they are. Like tonight, for instance. Last night, my husband got the news that his dad, who has been on hospice battling many forms of cancer, had less than 2 months to live. His throat cancer had returned (on top of the liver and colon cancer),
Hard, but not broken. And worth it anyway. Read More »
Did you know that the maximum volume of a 2023 Kia Carnival is only 45? And did you know, that in the throws of pretty extreme emotional distress, 45 is not nearly loud enough? Now, I’ve had some tough drives home from therapy. Drives when the music just HAS to be louder than the thoughts
All I can do is try. And keep trying. Read More »
Sometimes, life gets rough. And it gets you down. And it can be incredibly hard to keep going and keep fighting when it seems like everything that happens, ends poorly. That’s how it’s felt for me lately. Everything is hard. Everything I do is wrong. These things just keep happening. Truly horrible things. My newly
Finding the wins, even when they’re hard to find. Read More »
You know those nights that you can just…..predict where they’re going to go? Somewhere around 5pm today, that happened. I knew exactly where this night was going to go, and I asked my husband to help prevent that. Earlier in the day, he got frustrated with me. Me, already being sensitive, thought “oh great, he’s
When the feelings get way too intense Read More »
