Contradictory world

It’s hard to live in a contradictory world.

Parts of it will cheer you on, agree with your stance and viewpoint.

While others will surely massacre you for it. How dare you think that way, how dare you act that way.

You’ll never be able to win in a world that wants you to lose.

You, yourself, might be the contradiction. Holding opposing wants and actions.

I know I am.

Loving him terrifies me. It can only ever hurt me.
But he can also help to heal me.

You’re wrong for this choice…
You’re right for the exact same choice.

I want to grow, but I don’t want to change.
I want to change, but I’m afraid to let go.

It feels like all of the choices are wrong. Whatever I do, someone loses. Someone gets hurt. Most likely me, as well.

There is no winner in a world divided against itself.
There’s no winner when you’re divided against yourself.

Maybe it’s okay to be a contradiction. Maybe it helps us grow..helps us see what others see.

I desperately want to open up and be vulnerable, I want to learn how to say the things the are destroying me emotionally….but I can’t.

I want what I can’t have.

How do I make a choice that’s guaranteed to hurt someone no matter what I choose?

It doesn’t seem right for the world have so much input over the choices that I make….not unless I’m asking.

In a world full of contradictions…I just want to do what’s right.

…….whatever that means.

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