Well, here we are. The blog post that I did not necessarily want to write, but will do my best at anyway. Last night was my first brand new therapy session in years. Make no mistake about it, my therapist did not change, I still spoke with the same person I’ve been speaking with for […]
Change can be painful Read More »
Despite my pleads with Sunday to please hang around an extra day….here we are. At the beginning of another Monday. This Monday in particular is one I’ve been dreading for quite some time now. Therapy has gone rather horribly the past few weeks. And while I’m sure there’s more than one contributing factor…the biggest one
If you can imagine needing something sooo fucking badly. Just, with all of your body and soul and existence, needing something. Something to go well, something tangible, a feeling or an action….whatever it is that you need. And you have hopes. Not high ones….but….hope nonetheless. Well, that’s how I was feeling yesterday. With every ounce
This is how the story ends Read More »
It has been a long, long week. And I think I’m glad it’s almost over. Normally, Fridays are a more enjoyable weekday. The end of the week, the promise of the weekend soon to come, a less rigid schedule. Today is not that day. It’s giving some major Monday vibes, and honestly, I’m not here
Vulnerability hurts, and when the anger fades to sadness Read More »
I can think of few things that needed to happen as much as last night in therapy needed to happen. In case you’re new here, the only bit of context you might need is that my therapist and I have been working together for a loooong time. Like, 9-10 years. Every week. Sometimes twice a
Okay, therapist. I’ll let you in. Read More »
Ohhhhh boy. Just a bit of a preface here…I am feeling better today…as in…I don’t plan on getting drunk and killing myself. And I think I can…hesitantly say that my husband and I are back to normal. But it took a while to get there. Life this past week has been nothing short of absolutely
A week of chaos and unpredictability Read More »
Today was a bad day. Straight up, point blank. A bad day. It did not go the way I hoped it would, in fact, this entire week has not gone the way I thought it would. My husband and I got into an argument again, mostly because of communication (and his extreme lack there of),
When you don’t handle conflict the same way, anxiety, and some self hatred. Read More »
Things feel like they’re as bad as they possible can be right now. Now, I know, if your my therapist, you don’t necessarily give a shit about how it feels. And I supposedly should be doing better anyway. Therapy last night was bad. It just was. And after 2 bad weeks in a row, that
When it all comes crumbling down Read More »
I had an epically bad night last night. I started crying on the way home from therapy, and it got worse and and worse as the night went on. I literally could not calm down. And this morning, my eyes are still incredibly puffy and anyone who looks at me can obviously tell what kind
When things don’t quite go as planned Read More »
Last night, my therapist insinuated (or, really, flat out said) that our relationship might be something, bordering or resembling “secure” now. Now, if you’ve been following along for a while now, you’ll know that we’ve been doing a lot of work with relationships and attachments, and trying to form secure attachments, as opposed to anxious
