Lately, the hurt hurts. And it hurts really fucking badly. I feel like I don’t have even the most fleeting of moments to catch my breath. To catch up. To…..nullify or lessen even an ounce of the hurt. The days are so long, and the nights have felt even longer. Nightmare, after nightmare, after nightmare. […]
I just need a second Read More »
I’m definitely in a good bit of a funk right now. I’m hanging in there and doing the best that I can, but I can honestly say that I’m not where I want to be right now mentally. The weather is changing, it’s warming up…which means more stress on my heart and in my body
The lows will happen sometimes Read More »
I can’t help but feeling and thinking about just how vastly different things are now than how they were even just 5-6 months ago. Last night, I had therapy. Not with my therapist who I’ve had for literally the past 10 years straight of my life…but with someone extremely new, when you’re measuring it to
Trusting the process Read More »
I have so much racing through my mind and my heart. So much that I’m feeling, thinking…hoping for and afraid of. I feel so much. Yet, I don’t feel like I have any words. It happens occasionally, more often than I’d like…maybe twice a year or so. But I get this feeling. Like…I’m so broken.
If there’s one thing I’m sure of in life, it’s that our life in particular will just never be boring. It’s always going to be something, and all we can do is buckle up and prepare for whatever comes next. This week starts off with a Monday, much like all the other ones do. But
An abundance of chaos Read More »
This morning started off bright and early at 5am with an out of nowhere panic attack. Love that for me. Funny how these keep happening on Fridays. Every other Friday is pay day. Which normally is great. Except now these paychecks are spent before they even hit. And we’re in this cycle of things just
5am panic attacks, and finding ways to be grateful. Read More »
Ohhh boy. Things have ramped up over the last few days here. First of all, send up your prayers or good vibes or your positive energy or whatever you got to throw at me…because the flu is officially here. Phoenix tested positive yesterday, and it’s only a matter of time before the rest of us
Buckle up, life is about to get interesting Read More »
Damn. I hate phases of life like this. Where the dark feels impermeable, the hope is completely nonexistent, and the way out doesn’t seem to exist. I’ve been lying and bullshitting my way through the days these past few weeks. Showing up and trying to shove the depression monster down. But at night, it just
Depression Monster Read More »
Once again, here we are in Texas with well below freezing temps, waiting on yet another snow/ice storm to grace us with its presence this week. I’m not mad about it, the born and raised Long Islander was built for this and it finally feels right for my body temperature wise here. I’m still having
Venting about venting, and I’m so glad it’s winter Read More »
Last night I had therapy. It was one that I was anxiously anticipating for a few weeks, and to be honest, the anticipation of this particular appointment definitely messed me up mentally a little bit. What ended up being a nearly 2 and a half hour session definitely provided me with answers to questions I’ve
Getting an adult autism diagnosis: Confirmed, confused, and validated Read More »
