I am pretty over all of this sick season. My 6 year old and 4 year old have been sick back to back pretty much since Thanksgiving. We took all 3 kids to the doctor yesterday where they got breathing treatments and chest xrays. My 6 year old has a double ear infection and bronchiolitis. […]
Ready for things to be better now Read More »
8 and a half years ago, I experienced the most painful and the hardest thing I’ve ever been through. I said hello and goodbye to my son. In 2014, I gave birth to my first baby boy. The most perfect baby boy in the whole world. (Trust me, I’m sure.) It’s been 8 years. 8
Where there’s love, there is pain Read More »
This week has been my own personal version of hell. My 2 older boys have been sick with what I’m assuming is the flu, and I’ve been trying to take care of them while also trying to keep my 7 week old away from them. Ugh. It’s been a nightmare. It’s finally the weekend, and
There shouldn’t be, but there is a lot of shame that I have. Shame from being in pain. Shame from being less able bodied than anyone else in their 20s should be. The shame from knowing I need to use my wheelchair…but being too afraid to. I have a chronic, progressive, degenerative neuromuscular disorder. It’s
Today, my baby, who is now really my middle child (as of 7 weeks ago), turns 4. My little Phoenix Leo. A name that absolutely demands strength. A boy who’s body betrays him. Weak muscles and plagued with fatigue. But that’s the only weak thing about him. This boy is fierce. He is strong willed.
Every day I wake up with a twinge of pain, a reminder of the night before, I know I need to stop. Every day I struggle, just a little, to remember what happened the night before, I know I need to stop. When I’m pouring a drink and I feel like I’m being judged, or
Dear weekend, I’m not quite ready for you to leave me just yet. You were too busy, too fast, too chaotic. If I could just have one more day, one more Sunday… I’m just not ready to move on yet. I’m not ready to meet Monday where it is. Sunday, you weren’t good to me
I’m feeling feelings. Most are bad, but to be honest, I’m just glad they exist. I often feel so numb. So alone, so broken. Drinking had come back to me. And for as much as I hate it, there’s a part of me that loves it. I exist in a space that serves only to
Familiar bad feelings Read More »
I’m in a weird place right now, and I’ll be the first one to admit it. There are a lot of moments throughout my day where I feel completely awful. Where I want to give up, throw it all away, and just stop. It all feels very dark. But then, rarely, but occasionally…there are moments
Mostly dark, but a little grey Read More »
