What do you do when you get to therapy and there’s just too many things going through your head that you want to talk about? Sometimes I’ll spend all day stressing out because there is just so much on my mind. There is so much that I want to talk about and get through in […]
When there’s too much to talk about Read More »
Tonight is an absolute shit show, where I’m sure I’ve made mistakes. All I want to do is give up. All I want to do is listen to the demons and the voices in my head telling my my life isn’t worth it. That all I cause is pain and burden and problems. That voice
I had a doctor appointment this morning. Which honestly, is an accomplishment in it of itself. Last year when things were getting really bad for me, my therapist was starting to get kind of mad that I refused to go to a doctor. For some reason I just hate going. Ever since I was a
Oh, doctor appointments. Read More »
Sometimes I don’t know how to stop the sadness. It feels too big, too consuming. It almost feels cyclical. There are times of the day where I seem to always feel worse. In the morning, after my husband leaves for work and I’m left with facing the day alone. After I put the kids to
How to stop the sadness Read More »
As the title states….yeah. I just have no idea. Tomorrow I’ll have more more collected (sober?) thoughts. But for tonight… My husband came to therapy again tonight. We’ve been “sunshine and rainbows” this past week after shit seemed to hit the fan last week. Very typical of our relationship….ebbs and flows. It’s more often good
Pain is pain. We can acknowledge its existence or we can deny it. Either choice won’t make it go away. Something hurts. You feel pain, but you don’t want to. So you act like it doesn’t bother you, you stuff it down, smile…. “move on”. But can you really just ignore the pain, pretend it
Pain demands to be felt Read More »
I wrote half a post earlier. I didn’t like it. I wrote in my book shortly after. I didn’t like that either. Tonight was a lot. My husband came with me to therapy and we only got home an hour ago. I feel everything and I don’t know where to even begin. Apparently, I’ve tried
Too much to say, too much to feel. Read More »
Today has been a weird day. I had 2 hour therapy (for me) this morning, which went well, or at least I think it did. But ever since then, I’ve had this heavy and lingering feeling of anxiety. I don’t know what caused it, and I don’t know why I feel so bad…but I just
Anxiety out of nowhere Read More »
Hey there, sleep. It’s been a while since we’ve been in sync, hasn’t it? I’ve not seen much of you lately. We maybe spent 3 hours together last night. And not much more any other thought this past week. But, sleep, you’re supposed to help heal me. You’re supposed to help me recover from the
I try not to write when I’m in an active state of being upset, because honestly, no one wants to hear about that. Or at least, that’s what I assume. (I’m not good enough, no one cares, so change yourself.) I’ll feel what I feel and try to stuff it down. I’ll wait until later
